It's definitely that time in the year where things are beginning to become extremely stressful. Classes are getting difficult and on top of it all we are working hard to make the best possible productions we can. I don't know anybody in the world who works hard to put out a sub par movie. The thing about working extremely hard is sometimes you lose sight of why you do it. Why am I making this movie? Am I enjoying myself? Is this what I want to do for the rest of my life?
Lately I have had this trouble. The production has become extremely stressful at certain points and although I love my crew when I get behind the lens of the camera I almost feel like its a chore, like homework. I was so nervous that every shot I took was so important and there is this huge weight on my shoulders because I want to make something to be proud of. Pressure is good but I let it get to my head. I lost sight of why I enjoy it.
Luckily the other night I took a step back. This past Tuesday I did something I haven't done in a long time. I went out and shot for fun. It was a snowy night and I went out at midnight and shot an empty campus dimly lit. It was peaceful and it reminded me of why I do make films and shoot photos. I decided after a half hour my extremities were too cold and I should probably go inside. It took ma another 45 minutes because I was so excited to shoot again I couldn't stop. My advice to myself and everyone else is don't forget why you love what you do. I'm only nineteen and I have a lot to learn but this is something I hope I never lose track of again.
Here are some of the photos I took that night.